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You are right @juliet, most men a afraid of independent ladies, because it is believed that a man should take top responsibility of caring for his woman.
I came across an article while I was surfing the internet about being in a relationship with a woman who earns more than a man, so I felt this could be of help to men who think dating an independent woman is a problem
Dating a woman who makes more money than you can be a bit of a blow to your self esteem. You may sometimes get the sense that you are not enough for her and that you have to do more. Maybe there are things you wish you could buy her but cannot afford. The thing to remember is that at the end of the day our paycheck is not what defines us. We are worth much more than any amount of money we could earn. The problem is that society as a whole puts so much emphasis on money and social standing that it is hard to feel like someone’s equal if you make less money than them. This is especially true if the woman in the relationship makes more money than the man.
The Need to Provide
All men have an inherent desire to provide for the ones they love. This is not to say there are not some dead beats out there that could care less but generally speaking men are providers at heart. If you are in a relationship with a woman who is making more money than you, you may be feeling a bit inadequate in this department. If you are in this situation try to realize that you have a few choices here. You can either strive to get a better paying job and improve your income or you can resign yourself to the fact that she makes more money and get on with your relationship. As long as she does not seem to be effected by the fact that she makes more money than you, you really should not sweat it. You can provide in other ways like making her feel beautiful and loved as much as possible. A woman wants to be cherished; she does not want your paycheck. If she does want your paycheck more than she wants you then she may not be the right girl for you.
You Can Still Offer Gifts
Even if you feel like you can never buy your woman anything close to what you think she deserves, there is no reason you cannot still buy her gifts. A woman who cares about you will not frown upon a small or inexpensive gift. She will be happy that you took the time to think of her. Women, by nature, love to be appreciated and shown how important they are. If you can only afford to buy her a single rose and a small box of chocolates then by all means do not be ashamed of it. Never hold back giving a woman a gift because you think it will not be enough. As long as it comes from your heart it will be.
Do Not Resent Her
Some men are so affected by the fact that their women make more money than they do that they actually begin to build resentments. This is very much like a little boy not liking to be beat by a girl on the playground or a guy who does not like that his girl is smarter than him. Grow up! This is not grammar school anymore. Do not resent your woman because she is successful. Be happy for her and share in her joy. She cannot help that she makes a nice living and more than likely she never set out in life with a goal of making more money than the guys she dates. If you feel as though you fall short remember that you own that feeling. She is just living her life. You will have to learn to live with her making a better in come than you.
Don’t Get Upset When She Offers You Help
Women are care takers by nature. It is part of the maternal instinct and there is very little to be done about it. If you are dating a woman who makes significantly more money than you and she really likes you then she isn’t going to want to see you struggle. It will be only natural for her to want to offer you some help. Do not bite her head off and get mad at her for offering to get you out of a jam or buy you something that you need. This will hurt her and make her feel bad. She wants to make you happy because she enjoys being with you. Unless she is throwing money in your face and not letting you forget that she brings home the bacon, you should really try and be easy about it. If she has something to offer you and you need it, do not be afraid to take it.
You Should Still Offer to Pay
Even if you cannot really swing taking her out to dinner, never just assume that she is going to pay the check because she makes more money. Do not forget that she also knows that she makes more money than you. Offer to pay the check sometimes. It is just a nice thing to do and it will show her that you are not trying to take advantage of her. The problem is that while some men get resentful when their ladies make more than them, there are also some who begin to take advantage and forget that their women still need to be courted sometimes. If she has your best interest at heart then she will not expect you to take her places or buy her things that are not within your means. If she does seem to expect this then you can either talk to her and let her know that you would love to do things for her but just cannot afford it or you can reevaluate your relationship with her.Thoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (helpful)
@samson, I would advice you go with what you have passion for, because your passion and drive, coupled with hard work for something you love will certainly make you succeed
In the world we are living today, talent alone isn’t enough, hard work atimes beats talent. Of what need is doing something because you are good at, and not really because you enjoy it?
I have seen musicians who are not really good in singing, but because of the passion they have for it, were able to pull crowd during a live performance on stage, and today they have earned a living from it. You don’t have passion for what you do, but you do it because you are good, how do you expect to motivate people when you yourself isn’t motivated?
Take Leo Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo for example, there’s no doubt that Messi is the most talented of the duo, but who is presently the world’s best footballer? Ronaldo of course. Why? Because he puts in his best, and worked hard due to the passion he has for the game.
So Samson, don’t just do something because you are good at doing it, do something because you enjoy it, and have passion for it. Remember, hard work and passion for what you do a times beats talentThoughtful Comments: 0.
“So if you’re a prodigy at something you automatically have passion for it” I will have to disagree with you on this @juliet, you could be s prodigy on something you don’t even know, so how do you expect to automatically have passion on what you don’t even know you are good at? It’s not possible dear.
I just gave you and example with a friend who’s good at playing guitar, not just good….. But very good, and still doesn’t like doing so.
I can play table tennis so well, better than how I play football, but I love playing football because I enjoy it, and for the passion i have for it. Being a prodigy at something doesn’t really mean you would have passion for itThoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (interesting)
Way I see it, what does it matter? If I never considered doing something, then chances are it’s something I likely would not enjoy. I’ll just throw in dancing, since I genuinely dislike to dance. No matter how good at it I may be, if I don’t enjoy doing it, then I’m just wasting my time on what I will perceive to be a menial task. On the other hand, if I struggle with something I love, then at least I’m getting some kind of intrinsic reward for my effort, and that will be a better use of my time.
Just because I’m good at it doesn’t mean I enjoy it. Have a friend who could play lead guitar just like all the top metal band lead guitarists but he absolutely hated playing the guitar. He could have made a living doing it but he didn’t see it as a gifted talent. He is a pipefitter instead doing construction work.Thoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (interesting)
That’s a very lovely piece @juliet. we don’t just sit and look, and later blame it on the government because of our negligence.
You failed to come out and vote for your candidate of choice, and later complain on the government’s wrong doing? No. Blame it on yourself.
We have had enough, we won’t continue to be treated like slaves in our land, we are Nigerians and Nigeria is ours. We need to make a difference.
How long will it take you to spend the #5000 you gonna get on election in exchange for your votes? (If at all it’s gonna be up to that amount) and later spend the rest of the governing period in distress? Let’s wise up
And for our prayer warriors and religious leaders/other people of strong faith, go get your PVCs rather than pray and pass prayer points, yes, prayers help. But I tell you, INEC will not count your prayer points on election day, but VOTES.
God himself asked us to help ourselves before he helps us, so let’s be wise, don’t be carried away by the little money you gonna receive on election day, your vote is worth more than that.
You don’t have clothes, and politicians give you soap and detergents on election day in exchange for your vote, what will you use the soap for?
You don’t have food stuffs and you are being given salt, for what?
A word is enough for the wise, I don’t know for you, but for me and my house, this change is gonna begin with us!Thoughtful Comments: 0.
I’m not trying to fend for BBN, because I’m not a fan, I would rather use my time for things that are important and beneficial to my life. Everyone is entitled to his or her opinion, and that’s why this platform is created for everyone to come up with what he or she has, exchange ideas, and those with the best of all ideas gets a reward as much as learning from it.
Truth be told, BBN is the least of our problems, even before the inception of the show, we Nigerians have issues, so in my opinion, I feel we shouldn’t just attribute that to BBN, but instead look for how to solve it
Bro, that show is rated 18, by that they believe such age should know about those things, but because of the hypocrisy in our blood due to much religion, ethnicity and so on, we tend to act like those acts are the main contributors of immorality in our country. From my personal research, i came out with analysis of 73% of our youths have had sex or romantic intercourse during their teen age.. (could that be as a result of BBN?). How about Nollywood movies, the musical videos being aired on TV? Come on bro!
To me, BBN isn’t an immorality in disguise; i have heard that Kemen, (a participant from last year) was disqualified because he sexually abused a housemate without her consent. what does his disqualification teaches us? They don’t support that, and try to show the public that such attitude is bad. Countries like Us and the rest of the western world develop their various countries through entertainment and reality shows that depicts nuances more than BBN.
Bro, the only potholes I find in the show is that, they are extorting from this nation, because we pay them much through the votes and they end up not paying our government or improving our community since the show is held in South africa. Also, our youths instead of using the time spent on watching the show to invest in their lives and make a better living out of it fail to do so. We are all grown, we should lay more concern about things to improve our nation, rather than just attributes stuffs to BBN.Thoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (interesting)
An effect on my grammar, etc.? No. That’s because I distinguish between more formalized writing, e.g., work communications and reports, and writing which doesn’t require that kind of structural precision. However, I am seeing it creep into the writing of my peers, friends, and associates, even in work place settings. Is this bad? Not necessarily. If the recipients understand what’s being written, that’s all that really matters: effective communication means getting the message across.
What I am seeing though, is an increase in instances of auto-fill errors, which spell-checkers don’t catch, because they’re not misspelled. On top of that, many don’t review and edit their writing; they just hit send. Most of the time, it’s not a big deal, because we skim and scan and interpret from context anyway, but sometimes it produces genuine WTF moments.
Language evolves – getting worked up over it won’t stop it from happening.Thoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (interesting)
@chinasa, if you have read the rules, then you should have come across a statement which reads “points will be awarded by a group of judges on whether your post meets one of the following; informative, insightful, interesting or witty” just as Juliet mentionedThoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (helpful)
However @femi, the business will need thorough research, as you would have to know the active ingredients to which each plant contains and what ailments it cures, in addition to the concoction proportionality of the various herbs for a particular ailmentThoughtful Comments: 0.
@Femi, thank you, I will sure contact you when I the idea gets to be implemented. It is no doubt capital intensive, but could be feasible with the help of some investors.
Talking about your business idea, I so much love it, with my knowledge of biochemistry, synthetic drugs have adverse side effects and the accumulation of these chemicals in our body could result to damages to vital organs in our body such as the kidneys, heart and Liver.
My Undergraduate research work was on the effect of Shea butter rich diet on drug induced nephrotoxicity (kidney damage) on rats. Gentamicin a synthetic drug was used to induce kidney damage on rats, after which an extract of Shea butter oil was mixed with the animals feed as medication to remedy the kidney damage caused as a result of the gentamicin injection. The result turned out to be positive. The Shea butter rich diet ameliorated the drug induced kidney damage.
In essence, I’m saying the use of natural herbs from plants is better and safer than synthesised drugs.
Femi, I love your idea, and I would like to partner with you in this.Thoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (informative)
Social media, a quickly growing and popular knowledge outlet, can become dangerously addictive if the user lacks self-control. There are so many wonderful outcomes from the invention of social media. The biggest being how quickly news can spread. Anyone can share the news that they desire with a few taps on a screen. The fault in this action though, is that false testimonies can be spread just as quickly as true ones. The question is, does the positive outweigh the negative enough for a person to proceed with using social media? Without this innovative creation, though, communication would be dull and boring, so by all means, social media should be used.
Our society depends on knowledge. A new way to communicate this knowledge quickly is through social Media Facebook page, WhatsApp groups and so on. Learning through social networking is very useful because the participant can learn the things he wants at the rate he desires. Several social media sites have become largely popular, like Facebook and Twitter. With new sites being created year round, it is quite obvious that social networking sites will be prevalent for a while. The main reason social media has become so common is because of its quick access. Anyone can know virtually anything he desires if enough time and effort are put into finding that info. Knowledge alone has a very powerful aspect. As humans, we long for a sense of knowledge because we are curious beings. People want to know what is going on around them. Not only does knowledge provide a sense of satisfaction, it also expands our options.Thoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (interesting)
Nice one dear, water is essential to life, as such, delving into it will be a lucrative business. However, you have to come up with specific strategies that will differentiate your products from that of your competitors because of the ever increasing water bottling companies.
My own business idea on the other hand is the production of biogas/fuel from waste products. Specifically thrashes of polythene bags, plastic bottles, and papers.
Apart from making wealth, it will also serve as a means of cleaning up the environment, because the raw materials are basically the litters in our environments.Thoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (interesting)
My suggestion on how government can reduce the rate of unemployment is through restructuring of the NYSC programme: These recent times have witnessed several rumours of the NYSC programmes being scrapped out entirely by the government and being made optional for graduates, I must say that scrapping out the programme entirely or making it compulsory will not drive the boat of the young graduates to the promise land, I recommend that there should be a total and complete restructuring of the scheme in the sense that the camping period be increased from three weeks to two months with better facilities for sustenance of life in every camp, that the normal camping activities, education, sensitization, social activities, drills and military trainings should continue but the Skills Acquistion and Entrepreneurship Development Programme (SAED) should be made more effective. The very essence of the two months camping, should be to ensure that every corp member learns a particular skill effectively and instead of being posted to Places of Primary Assignments(PPA) they should be paid there accumulated ‘Allawee’ for the year at once, to go and invest in any skill which they have learnt during the two months camping. With that, the corp member starts up a business of his own and with a little time, he becomes an employer of labour instead of wasting time submitting C.Vs and all that. Being someone that has completed his one year compulsory service, I must say that the treatments meted out by the host communities where these corp members find themselves are really dehumanizing, such treatments come in the form of, lack of accomodation or high cost of getting one, high cost of living which reduces savings, unfriendly gestures by the villagers.Thoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (interesting)