April 19, 2018 at 7:47 pm #9989
SamsonParticipantFiltered Thoughts Points: 4730
Who else have noticed this trend of privileged people choosing to help only those that can pay them back the favour?
Of course, courtesy demands we appreciate every good deed done to us by expressing gratitude not only in words but also actions…but that same courtesy doesn’t demand that we offer help only to those able to return the favour…especially when we really have nothing to lose.
Even our holy books supported selfless assistance which can be summarized to giving without expecting a return.
This above philosophy helps to reduce disappointments as most of givers nowadays expect so much in return and end up getting disappointed unlike when nothing was expected back.
One day on my way trekking back to school, this man whose car broke down begged me to help him push it to a parking space which was really far in front.
I joined him, we pushed for long and on parking I just walked away without even giving him an eye contact which might have been misunderstood considering the type of street it was where everyone demands reward for help.
Another case was with a man whose car front tyre got stuck in a gutter. He didn’t even beg us to but I and my friend joined the others to free the car and as he thanked us we just walked away while the rest boys gathered round him for reward.
It might seem like a norm but it definitely pollutes the mind which causes victim to victimize others and the cycle continues.
If we all abide by this philosophy, I see a lot of mentality getting positively influenced and repeating the cycle to others…and soon the world wouldn’t be filled again with selfless humans and so much loveThoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (informative)
April 19, 2018 at 9:56 pm #9992
chibabyParticipantFiltered Thoughts Points: 610
Helping for reward has been the order of the day,and that is the reason why some people moves get disappointed always.for example the reason why girls get disappointed mostly is because they date guys ,help them and hoping for the guys to pay back by getting married to them but get disappointed by the guy,we are all human and no one can predict the future when we wants to help ,we should help without requesting or hoping for reward in order not to get disappointed because the only one who can reward you is GodThoughtful Comments: 0.
April 20, 2018 at 10:07 am #10008
AdebuluParticipantFiltered Thoughts Points: 560
I can say this boldly that anyone who is helping other people in expense of getting reward from them is not rendering help, he’s only incurring debt on the person he’s trynna help because the one they helped might not be able to return the favour.
Helpers who don’t expect reward from people they want to help will get there reward from any angle, their reward might even come in double, Helping Mr. A without expecting anything from him will prompt him to tell your goodness to Mr. B and Mr. C and when you prolly need help someday, am sure Mr. B and Mr . C would help you too because of the news that precedes you.
. But moment you are helping Mr. A and you are expecting a reward from him, then your reward will only be fixed to Mr. A and not from any other person.Thoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (interesting)
April 21, 2018 at 9:41 am #10039
SenrosoParticipantFiltered Thoughts Points: 650
Rendering help to others is rendering self service, which can only be done by a humble person, a heart full of humility will always get exalted, the reward might not come immediately but surely it’ll be rewarded. When we do something for people and expect something in return, for me it is politics no longer a helpThoughtful Comments: 0.
April 21, 2018 at 10:15 am #10040
Volani EParticipantFiltered Thoughts Points: 190
Being an help to someone is simply an amazing gift that is so rare in our world this days. when you find yourself in that position of rendering help to someone never let go of that character. Such character is Golden.Thoughtful Comments: 0.
June 9, 2018 at 7:06 pm #11020
ChinasaParticipantFiltered Thoughts Points: 1320
Yeah. It can be sometimes painful for the person being helped when the helper makes them feel about it if they are not able to repay in kind.
I know a young girl who was helped by an inlaw after she lost her parents only for them to make her feel ungrateful because she refused to agree with them on something she didn’t believe in which they did. It was so hurtful for her that she began wishing she never recieved their help in the first place. She no longer had a right to her decisions anymore because if she did they reminded her of that help they rendered her. It was like she had to become loyally bound to them whether or not she thinks what they are doing is right or wrong. This kind of help is grevious to the reciever. It makes them feel little, as if they wouldn’t have been anything without their helper. It’s painful.
Sometimes when these motive-motivated helpers come they behave as if they are genuine. Later, when they need you to do something for them which disagrees with you they get really and start reminding you of their good to you. It’s not fair. The fact that you helped me doesn’t mean I must be the one to help you. Your help can come from any other place. So don’t focus on me.
Of course we all desire loyalty from the people that we help but let’s not make it the reason why we help them. Don’t say no to someone if it is in your power to do good to them.
Even if I don’t or can’t help you now, who know whether I’ll be your saviour in the future (or even your children’s)? Let’s not spoil the good we do for others by making demands on it. And I totally agree with what Adebulu writes.Thoughtful Comments: 10. 10 (informative)
June 10, 2018 at 1:15 am #11027
CHIJANNParticipantFiltered Thoughts Points: 3320
Formerly people help others not for any reward but now most people help people out and demand for pay. I wouldn’t know if it is because of the economic hardship in the country or lack of morals.
Having said that, one should know that he can not compare the joy that a help he rendered without asking for a reward will give him with the joy the money’reward’ he collected for helping someone will give him
There is a type of massive boundless joy one gets when he helps someone out for freeThoughtful Comments: 0.
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